Ah, the U.S. Open in Huntington Beach. Our yearly reminder that carnivals, concerts, BMX, surfing, and absolute madness can coexist. Here’s your guide to this year’s circus.
MONDAY, AUGUST 1
Option A: Go watch young girls and even younger boys surf.
7:30 a.m. – 1:41 p.m.
Round 1 and 2 of Women’s World Tour event
1:42 p.m. – 3:25 p.m.
Junior Men’s Quarterfinals
Option B: Go to work.
TUESDAY, AUGUST 2
Option A: Watch the first round of the Men’s PRIME event from the bleachers.
7:30 a.m. – 3:45 p.m.
Round 1 of Men’s event begins (Heats 1-16)
Options B: Watch the first round of the Men’s PRIME event from your cubicle.
At 7:30 p.m. you can either:
A) Go watch the Gudauski and co. get weird at the Vans’ Get-N Classic VIP World Premiere at the Lido Theatre (3459 Via Lido, Newport Beach, CA. 92663). That is, if you can get in.
B) Go to RA Sushi (155 5th St., Huntington Beach, CA 92648) to see the new Billabong Taj Collection and watch the screeening of Blow Up . That is, if you can get in.
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 3
Option A: Wake up hungover from Get-N Classic and/or Taj party and call in sick. Then, make your way to Huntington Pier, get yourself a spot in the bleachers, and watch:
7:30 a.m. – 11:37 a.m.
Round 1 of Men’s event finishes (Heats 17-24)
11:38 a.m. – 1:41 p.m.
Round 3 of Women’s event
1:42 p.m. – 4:47 p.m.
Round 2 of Men’s event (Heats 1-6)
Option B: Wake up hungover from Get-N Classic and/or Taj party and call in sick. Then, connect your computer to your television, have a seat on the couch, and log on to the U.S. Open Live, and revel in the fact that you are far more comfortable than those sweating at the beach.
Once again, at 7:30 p.m. you have a decision to make. You can:
A) Go to Transworld’s Surprise Excitement Party and Red Bull’s Minor Threat Premieres at the Lido Theatre (3459 Via Lido, Newport Beach, CA. 92663).
B) Go watch the much-anticipated World Premiere of Globe’s Year Zero at 776 West 16th Street
Costa Mesa, CA 92627.
THURSDAY, AUGUST 4
Option A: Watch more heats!!!
7:30 a.m. – 10:35 a.m.
Round 2 of Men’s event finishes (Heats 7-12)
10:36 a.m. – 12:39 p.m.
Round 4 of Women’s event
12:40 p.m. – 4:47 p.m.
Round 3 of Men’s event begins (Heats 1-8)
Option B: Quietly choose to avoid the interim rounds of heats, and check the results at the end of the day here instead.
Do you like supermodel Marisa Miller? How about Vanessa Hudgens?
If yes, at 4:30 p.m. head over to the U.S. Open Music Stage to watch Hurley Walk the Walk National Championship, where you can drool over Host Hudgens and Judge Miller.
If no, what’s wrong with you?
How do feel about throngs of screaming fans?
Like. Go to The Sounds Concert at the U.S. Open Music Stage at 6:00 p.m..
Don’t like. Go home.
At 7:30 p.m., really there is only one option. Go to the Kai Neville’s much-anticipated-er Lost Atlas World Premiere at The Strand in Huntington Beach, and try to convince the girl with the wristbands to give you one.
FRIDAY, AUGUST 5
Option A: I love heats!!
7:30 a.m. – 9:33 a.m.
Men’s Round 3 completes (Heats 9-12)
9:34 a.m. – 11:37 a.m.
Men’s Round 4 begins (Heats 1-4)
11:38 a.m. – 1:41 p.m.
Option B: Wander the 14 acres that the U.S. Open covers, collect free schwag from booths, stare at strange people, then at 10:00 a.m. go watch Taylor Knox, Chuck Linnen, George Downing, and Simon Anderson inducted into the Surfer’s Hall of Fame at 300 Pacific Coast Highway. Then, go watch the Life Rolls on Expression Session from 1:42 p.m. – 2:12 p.m. and be truly humbled.
At 4:30 p.m., you have two options:
Jimmy Eat World Concert
(Remember them, with such early 2000s hits as “The Middle”)
Miss Reef Signing at Jack’s
(A decision that makes itself?)
SATURDAY, AUGUST 6
Option A: Wake up at 6:00 a.m. to go find parking. Watch the morning events:
8:00 a.m. – 10:03 a.m.
Men’s Round 5
10:04 a.m. – 10:54 a.m.
10:55 a.m. – 11:46 a.m.
Junior Women’s Semifinals
Option B: Roll out of bed mid-morning (it’s been a hard week, you deserve it). Make your way down to the pier for what will likely be the heat of the day: Kelly, Dane, Jordy, Mick, Taj, Parko, Julian, Machado, and Alejo Muniz in the WPS All-Stars Heat from 1:41 p.m. – 12:37 p.m. Then, once it’s over, you can buy their jerseys for thousands of dollars.
Option C: Support the youth. Show up at 1:20 p.m. and watch the finals of the Junior events:
1:20 p.m. – 1:40 p.m.
Junior Women’s Final
1:41 p.m. – 2:11 p.m.
Junior Men’s Finals
2:12 p.m. – 2:42 p.m.
Then, go to the MGMT concert at 4:30 p.m. – 7:00 p.m. at the U.S. Open Music Stage.
SUNDAY, AUGUST 7
Wakey wakey. Time to pull your hungover self out of bed for the last day of madness. You have no options. You will watch all of the heats. All day. And you will love it.
8:00 a.m. – 10:03 a.m.
10:04 a.m. – 11:05 a.m.
11:06 a.m. – 11:56 a.m.
WPS All-Stars Final
11:57 a.m. – 12:22 a.m.
12:33 p.m. – 1:24 p.m.
1:35 p.m. – 2:00 p.m.
2:01 p.m. – 2:36 p.m.
2:47 p.m. – 3:07 p.m.
3:08 p.m.: Start looking forward to next year.
–Log on to Usopenofsurfing.com, click on “schedule,” choose the events you’re interested in, and they’ll send you updates about changes to those events via email.
–Avoid promo girls carrying logo stencils and spay paint.
–Pacifico will be passing out $5 Yellow Cab vouchers at local businesses and will be providing free shuttle rides for people 21 and over.