Merry Christmas, enjoy the weirdness of the week.
This week, Dane Reynolds presented us with his “Declaration of Independence,” in which he explains, “i’ve been getting some pressure from various people and/or websites to write something, sorta like an official statement concerning my exit from the world tour. my dismount. my pirouette…” It’s a long, sparsely punctuated opus in which he levels with us, explaining, “i feel like a baseball. the skins been carefully pried off and there’s a thread and i’m gonna pull it and i’m gonna end up a pile of string on the floor. but then maybe i’ll be knit into something more useful, like a sweater. or perhaps something beautiful, like a hand embroidered masterpiece of a deer and two fawn drinking cold clear water out of a creek.” And then Sterling Spencer wrote his own. Click here to read it.
The Mourning of an Almost Loss
This week, actor Gerard Butler suffered a two-wave hold-down while filming for the Jay Moriarty movie near Half Moon Bay. The mainstream news article explains, “Butler was pulled underwater and dragged across a rocky reef by the force of the ‘mavericks.’” Yes, the force of the mavericks. And this was a news headline.
The World’s Largest Float, with Real Waves and Surfing Bulldogs
It was announced in a press release this week that Natural Balance Pet Foods and Ford teamed up to create a massive “Surf’s Up” themed float that will be certified Guiness World Records’ “World’s Heaviest and Longest Float” at the January 2nd Tournament of Roses Parade in Pasadena.The float will be “over 116 foot long float set on a moving beach with ‘live’ waves created by the World’s first rolling white water surfing machine.” Tillman (the skateboarding bulldog) and friends will ride the moving waves on the float as it makes its way through the parade. As the release states: “After extensive training, the dogs will actually surf on waves in more than 6,600 gallons of water on a float weighing more than 100,000 pounds.” This should be fantastic. Or a fantastic disaster. Can’t wait.
By surfer Catherine Clark.
Monterey Shark Attack Victim Recounts Experience
And gets a new board and money for medical bills from his friends. Awwww.
Surfing Santas, Of Course
Every year it happens. Overweight men don their Santa suit and paddle out, and then people look at them and take their picture and post videos on YouTube, and these men feel like heroes and it’s glorious. There are over 2,000 Surfing Santa videos on YouTube. This one has great sound effects.
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