What kind of surfer would each candidate be?
With Super Tuesday primaries being held today, let’s dip a toe into the fetid, disgusting waters of politics to ponder what kind of surfer each of the four major candidates might be, if they were regulars at your local lineup. An ocean-goers voter’s guide follows. Donald Trump Trump arrives at the beach in a muscled-up
I'd bet the farm on one of these five locks for the 2015 crown
With the anything-but-quick Quik Pro and the Bells slopfest in the books, predicting contenders for the 2015 WSL crown is a breeze. This is especially true because, unlike, say, baseball, which will occasionally produce champions that nobody on earth would predict (see: San Franciso Giants, years 2010, 2012, 2014) top tier pro surfing hasn’t had
A cost benefit analysis
From 30 years of observing guarded lineups across the globe, the first thing I should have told him is that localism is an inexact science. Regardless of how close you live to a spot, or how many years you’ve put in, or how well you follow the unspoken rules, or how good of a surfer you are, you are still subject to the whims and moods of the presiding alpha males—often hair-trigger snap-cases that hand out arbitrary verbal or physical punishment at a moment’s notice. There are never any ironclad guarantees of pecking order, etiquette, or safety. It’s frontier justice, in the loosest way.
Don't think too hard about the ASP/WSL rebrand
Predictably, the masses have spoken, and they’re not exactly tripping over themselves in a rush to embrace the ASP’s name change to the WSL. This was expected by the ASP brass. It’s why they made their big announcement at 4 p.m. on a Friday—the time slot typically reserved for the news dump. If you’re going to
This version of pro surfing brings Sweet Georgia Brown to the surf
“If you were given a blank piece of paper and told to go off and design pro surfing, what would you do?” —Sean Doherty, SURFER Magazine, July 14, 2014 I’ve got two words for you Sean: Harlem Globetrotters. Do Australians watch the Globetrotters? Can you, Sean, even whistle the tune to “Sweet Georgia Brown”? Nevermind.
Sean Doherty makes a case for his version of pro surfing
If you were given a blank piece of paper and told to go off and design pro surfing, what would you do? What type of glorious Mister Squiggle/Jackson Pollock abstract masterpiece would you sketch? It’s a favorite exercise of people who claim to have absolutely no interest in pro surfing whatsoever, people who then sit
Or was it a 9.93? What did you think?
Most of the residual hype from the final day at the Rip Curl Pro surrounds the Round 5 heat between Julian Wilson and Jordy Smith. Needing a 9.97 to beat Julian (who’d just dropped a solid 9.13), Jordy took off on a wave with 40 seconds to go and surfed it as perfectly as many
Design North Shore 2 outta the picture, haole
Did you catch that? Turtle is wearing a Chandler Surfboards T-shirt! Somebody actually made a shirt festooned with the Chandler Surfboards logo. People really, truly, love North Shore. And now some of the people who really, truly love North Shore are getting desperate to make North Shore 2, a mere 30 years after the original
Why, finally, it's time to move on from King Kelly
Kelly Slater turned 42 this week. Mick Fanning is 32. Parko’s knocking on 33’s door. Taj is 35. That’s four of the ASP’s top-five, right there, all north of 30. This, as you may be aware, is unprecedented. Remember when Occy burst out of his mummy wrap to win a title at 33? The oldest
A herd mentality may be bad for surfing, but it's damn good for business
As I sat there watching it, I noticed something else. Just a short distance up the beach, less than a 100 yards north of the Lowers left was a newly-formed little right, which was surprisingly steep, consistent, and fun-looking. To my complete astonishment, however, the fifteen or so surfers populating the Lowers lineup were completely oblivious. Despite this ultra-fun, untouched wave in plain view, they seemed determined to stand their ground and guard some of the crappiest Lowers I have ever seen.